Sick of Being Stupid
by NightmaresAtMidnight
Summary: When Rei explodes at Serena old memories return and Serena's hidden hate resurfaces. Hate for herself and she decides she is tired of who she is. What will Serena do now that she is sick of being stupid.
1. Chapter 1

Sick of Being Stupid

I was in math class being bored when I was suddenly inspired. You may or may not like it, but all comments are welcome. I haven't written in so long it feels good.

"No that's completely wrong you stupid girl! How did you even make t to third grade? This is second grade Math!" shouted Rei at a cowering Serena. The rest of the girls looked up from their books and just sighed before returning to studying.

The girls had all been at Rei's grandfather's temple at another one of their usual studying sessions and Serena was being well Serena. However there is only so much of Serena one can take. Rei having the fiery temper was the first to explode at her. Serena, to Rei's complete annoyance, started laughing and saying how she hates school and doesn't care.

"YOU. DON'T. CARE???" asked Rei with something close to murder in her eyes. Serena was always able to read people's emotions quite well and knew Rei had been agitated way too much.

"YOU ARE THE STUPIDEST PERSON I'VE EVER MET. YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT SCHOOL OR THE SAILOR SCOUTS EITHER IS IT? YOU'VE NEVER TAKEN THIS SERIOUSY HAVE YOU? IS THIS ALL JUST SOME SICK GAME TO YOU? BECAUSE YOU SURE ARE ACT LIKE IT IS?" Rei's anger had died down by screaming it all out. The horror of what she had just said sunk in and she felt awful. The girl's were even shocked at this. I mean Rei had been made before, but Serena has always been like this and she always tried her best. In fact not all of it was Serena's fault, Earlier today she had been walking to school and tripped in mud, then Chad had conveniently disappeared when it came time to clean the whole temple and she could not handle anything else.

Serena sat still with her head facing to the ground so no one could see her face. She was crying yes, but not for the reason they all thought. It was all too similar. Too close to her past and her dreams.. no her nightmares. She could see them the flashes of mean kids the police changing schools all fled through her mind. It was her deepest fear her friends would turn out like her last.

"Serena I.." Rei never got to finish as Serena cut her off. "No Rei it's ok I understand I have to umm go somewhere." Serena ran out of the building faster than lightening trembling with tears that threatened to overspill. Rei went to reach for Serena, but stopped as soon as she saw a glimpse of her face. It would haunt Rei and the girls for quite a while that face. IN her haste Serena's bangs had lifted up just enough for the girls to see her heartbreaking on her face, with a single tears flowing down her cheek. And then she was gone. They knew Serena would need time to herself to cry, but she would be back to herself tomorrow and Rei would apologize at least they hoped…


	2. Chapter 2- Disbelief

Hey everybody! I realize the first chapter is atrocious, but I will eventually go back and rewrite it. For now I am just going to continue with the story and hopefully my writing ability has improved.

After leaving Rei's home

Serena ran at first, trying to use the burning in her lungs to distract from the ache in her heart. Unfortunately the sky seemed to sympathize with her pain and began to rain. Suddenly it began to pour and Serena could no longer feel any strength left in her body. Her knees trembled, and with one last quake she dropped harshly on her knees.

She sat in disbelief. Looking through misted eyes she tried to ascertain where she was. A bitter sob echoed from her mouth as she realized she was at the park. She curled into herself clutching her knees to her chest, trying to hold onto the tiny pieces of her being. She did not care how she looked right now, with the rain drenching her clothes or the blood dripping down her knees. She knew not one of them would look for her. She really was as dumb as they say right? Not in wit, no. But for believing that she had found true friends. Ones that would love her just as easily as she opened her heart to them and brought them all together.

Her eyes were hazy with pain and memories she began to wonder what she did wrong this time. No matter how happy she tried to be it was never good enough. SHE was never good enough. The lone figure in the park began shaking. From afar you might think she was simply shivering from being out in the rain. Serena began to laugh. At herself, at her life, what she has become. She loved being Sailor Moon. Protecting those she held so dear to her meant more than her own life. However the senshi didn't seem to understand how much energy being their leader meant. Constantly they were feeding off of her energy. Along with the large amount of power being Sailor Moon used it was no wonder she was too tired to focus or always eating without gaining weight.

She sighed and glanced up to the moon. Its presence had always been a comfort to her. Yes she knew why and if her senshi, the ones who were supposed to protect her didn't realize her worth, who was she to tell them. With one last biting laugh she picked herself up. She walked towards her home. This time it was not the events of the night that haunted her, but memories. The painful memories that sneak up when you are most vulnerable and eat at your thoughts. Lost in her pain she continued to walk all the way home with no awareness of her surroundings. No one noticed her though. She was nothing more to the people than a shadow that would find them in their dreams that night.

Now Serena's mother may seem harsh to her daughter at times, but Serena was her only daughter and she often worried about her. That's why she was pacing in the kitchen this early Thursday morning praying for her little girl to stroll through the door. She heard the tell-tale clicking of the doorknob and rushed to the door. Pulling it open her face filled with anger and judgment quickly dissolved into one of horror.

Serena glanced up into her mother's face for only a brief moment before she threw herself into her arms. With a whimper new tears began to fall from swollen eyes. Through the sob she could only make out words which pierced an old festering wound. "Momma it's happened again."

Kind of a cliffhanger not really thoughish. Sorry it has been so long for an update I will not give you a long boring story, but I'm back and using this story to test my writing ability. Thank you.


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